Northwood Ice Pentagrams - The lost interview (2000)

Q : Nocturnal Greetings, oh lord of somber evildark. How ya doin', thou?

A : I'm super thanks for asking!

Q : You already completed the third Northwood Ice Pentagrams album, and with it's 40 tracks and 73 minutes playing time, it's quite a behemoth! No doubt the longest black metal album ever! What is the title, again?

A : Foolish christian interviewer, you should already know that the title for the new NORTHWOOD ICE PENTAGRAMS album is TOWARD THE NORTHERN NORTH OF NORTHERN NORTHWOOD! The title represent the abolishment of the four cardinal points, which shall be replaced by NORTH, NORTHERN NORTH, NORTHER NORTH and NORTHEST NORTH. Heat shall be abolished, the cold winds of the eternal hellish northwood shall sweep the face of the earth and freeze the souls of every living being! Freeze to death, life! And then die! DIE! SATAN SHINES IN EVERY TINY ICICLE, let's fucking FREEZE OUR UNHOLY ASSES! -666 degrees celcius! Frost!

Q : The sound on this album is a lot heavier and more menacing than on the first 2 albums, why is that?

A : The first albums of NIP were recorded in Darktower studios. However, for this new album, I moved into Vomitwalls studios with my mighty evil guitar, Guitabarnakh.

Q : This is a lot less keyboards or acoustic than on previous albums, why?

A : ...

Q : There is no drums on about half of the tracks, what happened?

A : In an orgy of satanic delight and fury, I mutilated my drummer to death... may his punctured corpse rot in the fertile soil of the satanic northern northwood forest! He couldn't bash his unholy drumkit on half the tracks, since this ritual murder occured in the middle of the recording trances for the new album. But it doesn't matter, the alternance of drums and no-drums produce an highly ambient and atmospheric state of mind in the broken soul of the listener, leading him to sodomy, suicide and blasphemy simultaneously. All hail satan with black candles aflames in our nostrils, let's all perish in flames and choke the atmosphere with the smoke! The mighty unholy smoke! Can't ya smell it???

Q : I thought you were the drummer for NIP, also?

A : Indeed I am, and indeed it was myself that I mutilated to death. So I'm dead. I'm death incarnate, I'm LUCIFER, I'm SATAN, I'm everything and nothing at once, I embody the void, my soul is black, like a river of torments freezing in the icy flames of the satanic northwood forest... into branches we ride, we stride naked under the moon, with wolves as guides... licking our fur of the blood of dying jews. Hail Satanhitler! Hail the 666th Reich of evil and fire! Wotan mit uns!

Q : Any collaborators this time?

A : Krepuskull (formerly known as Nekrolaizbee) contributed vocals on the track "Watatatow (live)". The vocals are totally sexually deviant and unintelligible, producing an aura of evil, despair and disgust, hopefully leading any listeners to a trance of auto-sodomy, thus breaking apart their spine and making them paraplegic for the rest of their pathetic, weak lives.

Phthykhasthor contributed lyrics for the song "Fourrer les otages", which means in the french langage (the langage of homosexuality, thus the langage of antichristian sexuality, thus endorsed by Northwood Ice Pentagrams) - "Fuck the hostages". It is a mighty epic!

Northwood Ice Pentagrams 3

Toward the northest north of northern northwood

01.Fellatio Yehova Cunnilingus Satana
02.Biscuit au Zombie
03.Five Fucking Trees
04.Filles d'Aujourd'hui
05.Coagulating Morve
07.Murmures Mystiques de Crickets Nocturnes
08.La Chose de la 81
09.Northwoodian Elegy (Frosted Flakes of Frost Part II)
10.Unholy Unholiness
11.Fullmoon over Northwood
12.Glacier of Mighty Frost (Hommage to Immortal)
13.Nerfs de PaupiÞres Schizophréniques possédés par Satan
14.Black&Decker Metal
15.Sort m÷rk trolsk inne om mork sort Skogen
16.Trou dans le Front
17.The Final and ultimate eternal evil
18.Satan Invade the Dance Floor
19.Industry of Maury
20.With Leather - Oath of the Fear
21.Invocation of Saittam
22.Vasectomie au Scalpel
24.Ostie de Vendredi Soir
25.Summoning Tolkien
26.Fourrer les Otages (lyrics by Phtykhasthor)
27.Watatatow Live (featuring Krepuskull)
28.Prowler (Iron Maiden cover)
29.To Tame a Land (Iron Maiden cover)
30.Foetal Incest - Grinding Feminism in the Jaws of Virility
31.2000 Megavolt Coma Trip [Doigt dans la prise]

32-Tabarnak (0:59)
33-Câlisse (0:59)
34-Criss (0:59)
35-Viarge (0:59)
36-Sibouare (0:59)
37-Sacrament (0:59)
38-Sti (0:59)
39-Baptème (0:59)
40-Crucifix (0:59)

Northwood Ice Pentagrams 4

Volume 4
19 July 2000
Guitar/bass/drums/keyboard/lyrics/recording : Akhalatabarnakh

1-Ritual basement sacrifice (2:00)
2.Dissolving humanity in varsol (1:48)
3.Unholy champs de pissenlit (2:38)
4.Into the jaws of the paramount (Part I) (1:16)
5.Into the jaws of the paramount (Part II) (2:01)
6.Skullfuck (2:29)
7.White Socks Revenge (1:39)
8.Soaked to death in Granby (1:47)
9-Salopes INC. (1:57)
10-Sous les décombres de Paris (19:19)
11-Devirginizator (1:45)
12-I am several wizards at once (featuring Trym) (0:58)
13-Complainte d'une dinde Endimanchée (2:43)
14-Nothing (?:??)
15-Mexican highway techno banjo exorcism (en sandales) (0:34)
16-Die Ned Flanders (1:34)
17-Fuck you all criss (1:07)
18-Into the stomach of Wolves (2:07)
19-Kill all fucking telephones (1:25)
20-Arctic Powers of Evil (3:49)
21-Constipation Eternal (2:32)
22-Oreilles d'antichrist (0:49)
23-Northwood symphony orchestra (featuring the Northwood choir) (1:32)
24-Too many javascript errors (1:44)
25-A little moonlit stroll in northwood (1:20)
26-Mine is the power of the darkside (featuring Yoda) (1:21)
27-Subdivisions (Rush cover) (5:25)
28-Holy Smoke (Iron Maiden cover, featuring Lord Jasminoo) (3:17)

Northwood Ice Pentagrams 5

Menstrual winds in the forest of misogyny
November 5 2000
Recorded in vomitwalls studios, summer/fall 2000
Guitar/bass/drums/keyboard/lyrics/recording : Akhalatabarnakh

1-Aerie (intro) (0:50)
2-Dead by dawn (1:37)
3-4 AM Laval Poltergeist (2:25)
4-Polish Warrior Halasa (1:15)
5-Les trolls (3:17)
6-Pornland digital (1:56)
7-Hoctober euphory - november spleen (2:11)
8-Beneath the flaring orifice of satanus (2:11)
9-Second Frigidia (Return of the Empress) (2:50)
10-Boyfriend beating club (0:59)
11-Blanc cil mutant (2:11)
12-Obvious troll, disregard entirely (1:23)
13-Défilé (2:13)
14-Malaise (0:45)
15-Friture (1:12)
16-Fucking Lundi (2:29)
17-Döden flåsar i hans nacke (2:06)
18-Beneath the soil of northwood (1:01)
19-Melancholic night (3:09)
20-Escalade des carpathes (2:17)
21-Transilvanian love song (4:18)
22-Format my C (0:42)
23-Cocktail techno lounge (1:09)
24-La folle (2:16)
25-Machoires de Satan (1:58)
26-Dechrist (3:25)
27-Ghost of the Navigator (Iron Maiden cover) (6:30)
28-Transilvanian Hunger (Darkthrone cover) (5:12)
29-Drunken solo (9:45)
30-Transparent (outro) (0:27)
Total : 74:02

Northwood Ice Pentagrams Album 6
666 Mighty Satanic Mountains

01-Styevamycin (1:43)
02-Welcome to alabama (2:19)
03-Fucking dwarf of archambault (1:44)
04-Encounter with Joëlle (0:45)
05-The bonedick (1:36)
06-Fuck anything that moves (0:57)
07-Septentrional northwood (1:23)
08-Comédique romantie (1:53)
09-Cold floors of may (1:13)
10-Bowel evacuant kit (1:23)
11-Forest of misogyny (1:51)
12-The calm before the storm (1:13)
13-Evil bike ride (1:05)
14-The helicopter song (2:37)
15-Balefire all her exs (0:49)
16-From the northwood (2:05)
17-Third frigidia (1:37)
18-Teenfucker (1:30)
19-Magical night of frost (1:35)
20-Magical day of frost (1:36)
21-Double gencives greffées (1:28)
22-Metamucil extradoux (2:00)
23-Punk sucks (0:53)
24-The Deer (1:18)
25-World trade center (1:12)
26-September Cell (1:41)
27-Astral Fuck (2:02)
28-Northwoodian Lore (2:03)
29-Get a Room (1:33)
30-Solarworm (1:03)
31-Les cités d'or (1:33)
32-Fin (0:32)

Total 48:12