habit

note to pearl jam fans: please click the link in derrick's latest update. thank you for playing.

its 4 pm. ive been awake nearly 12 hours, half a day. if i had to summarize in a word how its gone, i would say: comical. its been a comical august 24th.

alarm at 4:45. snooze till 4:54. watch some of 'we were soldiers' which i forced myself to stop for the sake of sleep last night, until 5:05 am. at 5:20 i was good as out the door...and then i noticed that a wasp had flown into the house. anyone who has read me over a good length of time knows i get wasp paranoid because of the cats. i worry they'll get stung and freak out, or worse, be allergic and inflate or worse, croak. so even though i have to be at work in precisely ten minutes, i go about attempting to squash the wasp...the one live species exempt to my strict no kill policy. well one of two actually but im not talkin bout them creepy crawlers right now.

so. i wish i had had a video camera on me to catch the folly that was me attempting to be crafty at that ungodly hour. i had my bulky awkward ikea catalogue as my weapon, but the wasp was flying around the lampshade. not the most solid or stable of locations. i didnt get close, about 10 times. then i said fuck it, and caught the damn thing in a small glass. i am the freakin wasp hunter, tell that croc guy to move over (and to stop yelling, while you have his attention, its an accent not a megaphone)....i digress.

i release the wasp back out the kitchen balcony and am relieved and pleased with myself. i look at the cats. they are looking up. i look up. its now 6 minutes till i have to get to work. there are three more wasps flying under my kitchen light fixture. THREE. there is nothing i can do, im already going to be ten minutes late for work. i look at my cats willing them the brains to not fuck with the wasps, and apologize and leave. i HATE myself in so doing. i am sure i will be needing two kitty bodybags in the near future, and all because my precious restaurant job couldnt wait. i would never forgive myself. i would have my tubes tied for if this is what i do to felines imagine imagine IMAGINE the damage on a human.

so. im at work. all i want to do is go home and check on the kitties and find out where the fricking wasp nest/hive is. and then WHAMMO it gets busy, and stays busy until 1:40 pm, 20 minutes before i leave. i run like an arse and am not at my best. man do i get bitchy when im in the juice, but i try to control it, and today tho i was clearly tense and sweating it, i kept my sense of humor. (or so i think...). with the help of many i got through it though, and it was a more than decent financial day.

i also broke it to my manager that i called the 'normes de travail', employee law type place, and found out officially that i do not in any way have to pay the credit card scammers bill, that its my legal right not to. i am not responsible. i leave work feeling rather monied. =) and come straight home for mission rescue the damn cats. fuck the gym, as they say.

i get home to the hood. the st laurent street fair is in full swing and its a beautiful hot sunny day, and because that street is closed to traffic there is absolutely ZERO parking on my street, and traffic is thick. i circle once, i circle twice, and i realize then that i am blowing my rescue mission. so i say fuck it, its saturday, the green onion bastards will understand the situation what with the street fair...i'll park illegally here for a moment and go scope the scenario. i drop the buick right in front of my house.

i enter my abode. there are no four pawed friends at my feet. there are none in the living room. HARK! there is one, on my bed, snoozing. woo! but where oh where is the big fat white fnooper? not in the kitchen, not on the balcony, not in the can. but there, there in the back room, head down from his nap but eyes open to see me. nary a wasp carcass in sight. i guess all parties survived unscathed. joy!

i make two veggie dogs and check mail. i remove my ball and chain (aka uniform of jeans and white button down) and chill at the computer. i stroll through the house and check my messages and am surprised to hear anita is home (dude, that was fast) and as i stroll past my window in the living room i happen to glance down at the car. you know, the white car i been driving. the one in front of my house. the one with the big fucking goddam fresh stinky bitch ass ticket on it. queen above the law gets nailed. little miss moneybags saves 50 in credit card fraud, but flushes 40 on kittie paranoia and 4:45 forgetfulness. goddam idiot. well, at least now i dont have to move it. let it sit there ticketed till morning. they cant nail me again. =)

tell me this day is not comedy in motion. its been totally goofy.

im gonna go listen to the expos, call anita back and catch the rest of we were soldiers.
the shipping news? here's my headline: spacey relives lester burnham role in depressing movie with annoying newfoundlandian accents. skip it.

stupid wasps. stupid tickets. stupid uniforms. three of north america's ugliest things, all so primary in my last 12 hours. i has to laugh.

new pearl jam record in 80 days. as long as it took some yo yo to go around the world.

something i noticed about me: *i* can make fun of my cats...but dont you dare bug em. i can make fun of my friends...but dont let me catch you dissin em for one second. got that? =)

two years ago today...jones beach new yawk. the whole jones beach trio melds into one big outing for me, two years later. i think it was the radio show on this evening...and ive officially had a face for coil for two full years. im still waiting for the delayed blindness to strike. =P

--is my band ready to kick it?--

holy productive day. and it aint over yet.

i'll play some catch up tho, just so i know what ive done with my days off. yesterday i chilled to the max, and by that i do not mean sat around and did nothing. hayell, no (/me moves head side to side with lips pursed and arm extended waving at same speed as my head, and snaps). i mean i stood in front of the fridge and defrosted my freezer. i think that in the history of frozen over freezers mine could have won an award. the space that was left to store stuff in was about the size of one tv dinner, and the rest was total iceberg action. not only was it frozen over on the inside, but on either side outside of it, as well as along the bottom of it, so that the door couldnt even close properly.

looking at it now, completely free of ice...i cant believe it. i dont recognize it. i dont remember the last time it looked like this. i know ive defrosted ONCE before, but i been living here 4 years. holly housekeeper i aint.

anyway i was kind of dreading it but i wound up getting really into it. i found a tip on the internet: place a bowl of boiling water in the freezer and close the door, then leave it for a half hour, then repeat. and it worked, totally. good thing, because the rate my blow dryer was melting the shit ida been left standing there till about, oh, 2009. it did still take like 5 hours total, but it was so worth it. the satisfaction and gratification of yanking huge sheets of ice out of there and into the sink...man it goes beyond description. i felt like xena. i kicked the ice's ass.

or the steam from the hot water did, but lets not get technical.

episode 2 of steph does not = holly housekeeper

my first attempt with the boiling water...lets just say i didnt grasp the concept. because i had so little space inside the freezer i had to use a really small dish of it....the ice must have had a good laugh at that. i waited like five minutes and then got impatient and said fuck it and opened it up. no difference at all. so i decided to make some leeway id melt the ice directly with the hot water, by pouring it on, like syrup on a frickin ice cone. except dumb ass me forgot that the water would pour out the back of the freezer and down into my fridge (circa 1959) as well as down the front of it. cue the water pouring down over the control dial and the LIGHT BULB...cue the light bulb popping right in its socket, cue broken glass on my floor and a jagged bulb hanging inside my fridge.

does this shit happen to anyone else? honestly?

one time i bought new soap for my then functional dishwasher, liquid. i was pretty pumped as i loved that dishwasher and wanted to treat it right. i ran it and walked away...and then turned around awhile later to see mega suds all over my kitchen floor. el brainiacque had struck again. it was dish soap all right, but not for machines. friggin idiot. it gets better. it was pouring every every everywhere and i was running around like mad...scooping it up with a bowl, shoving towels on the floor, in a panic. only after about 5 minutes of this did it occur to me: hey genius, why not start by stopping the wash cycle. i had let it continue to run that whole time. sometimes i have to laugh at myself so as not to turn myself in to the guys with the straight jackets. lobotomy queen.

anywho.

i watched two movies:

get well soon, starring courtney cox (who is monica in every part, including the springsteen video that preceded friends by what feels like a decade but likely wasnt), and vincent gallo, who i LOVE (if you havent seen buffalo 66 go see it now. today. now. i watched it twice the same day). love love love love love. this one was pretty decent. jeffrey tambor was in it in a role similar to that of who he played on larry sanders, and i find him hilarious. it was good.

wow look at that vincent gallo website. the guy is brilliant. he did all the music for buffalo 66 too. me, i pop the bulb in my fridge. go figure.

i also watched joyride, because i love steve zahn too. joyride, im sorry, is just too stupid. the ending makes no sense and is the hugest hole of all. im not gonna spoil it because its a decent premise and i was able to watch it to the end, but if anyone has seen it let me know so i can have the joyride of pointing out how crappy the ending is.

i actually watched the end of joyride before i got the show on the road today. i stopped it to listen to the miserable ball game in colorado which you might be able to guess that we did not win, and then i spoke to tim on the phone for the first time in a long while and had a really great laugh. he tends to make voices for people when he's telling a story, and i asked him to do the voice of any ex girlfriend and he was silent for a second and then came up with this vocal explosion that sounded like the exorcist's head spinning around all hysterical like shrieking something about 'why do you have to drink so much' and i totally lost it. i couldnt get control. i even done slapped my knee. it was a really fun conversation after which i knew the movie would pale in comparison, so i went to bed.

sooo. whatcha doin november 12th? me? dont bug me. thats the new date for the release of the new new new new new pearl jam record. new. can you say: WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!? i knew you could.

so after rewinding joyride i packed up and was out the door by one.

first stop, the empanada place. i was damned starving and needed some fuel because if i went grocery shopping on such an empty stomach i would buy everyfuckingsinglething i saw. got an artichoke/tomato/mozzarella/goat cheese/olive whole wheat empanada. yummy. then went and got actual fuel for the vehicle which was running on empty. then let a big ol recycling truck in in front of me on a busy street hoping it would bring me good parking karma. it totally did. parked at a meter with 45 minutes left on it...so what if there was a flattened and very dead fish twisted on the sidewalk...and went to the bank and to the videostore. next up are: chicago cab (FINALLY it was in) and the shipping news.

then stopped at katsou, a pet shop id never been to before, and wound up spending fitty dollahs on mac and eevee. got them a new food since the science diet sensitive skin works for shite, this one supposedly has all the good specialty stuff in one food...skin, fur, teeth, hairballs....and its less expensive too. they seem to like it...its crunchier. also got two biggish fluffy green and yellow mice things that squeak that they are loving too. of course mac stops playing with the one he has as soon as eevee starts playing with hers and tries to take hers away...boys can be such jerks. =)

then i bought me some groceries (but not before seeing a man in full gold lame pants...hairdresser, fer sure) and a wee present for my friend of the socks which shall go unnamed and stopped to pick up a new bulb, which i did no problemo...i figured it might be outdated and non existent what with the age of my fridge, but wasnt the case (so screw you portland!) and got some mushy bananas at the nasty produce place right by me that always has nasty produce, always, and came home.

then i made this:

Almost No Fat Banana Bread
This bread is surprising moist and has a wonderful
flavor. For a little variation, you can add nuts or raisins.
Prep Time: approx. 10 Minutes. Cook Time: approx. 55
Minutes. Ready in: approx. 1 Hour 5 Minutes. Makes 1 - 8x4 inch
loaf (12 servings).
Printed from Allrecipes, Submitted by Allison
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
3/4 cup white sugar
1 1/4 teaspoons baking powder
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon
2 egg whites
1 cup banana, mashed
1/4 cup applesauce


Directions
1 Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Lightly
grease an 8x4 inch loaf pan.
2 In a large bowl, stir together flour, sugar, baking
powder, baking soda and cinnamon. Add egg whites, bananas and
applesauce; stir just until combined. Pour batter into prepared pan.
3 Bake in preheated oven for 50 to 55 minutes, until a
toothpick inserted into center of loaf comes out clean. Turn out
onto wire rack and allow to cool before slicing.

allrecipes.com. awesome stuff. highly recommend. anyway, my almost no fat bread contained chopped nuts and chocolate chips and vanilla and i doubled the recipe. i had to bring the leftover chocolate chips down to the bassholes because otherwise i would have eaten all that was left (all 1/3 of the bag). i just popped them back in the oven because when i took one out of the pan the bottom wasnt done enough. DOH! they look really good though. lovely even. holly housekeeper makes a comeback. kinda.

im gonna bring em to work and scoff them back with my coworkers. i just felt like baking and had some (but not enough) mushy nana sitting around.

and here we are. i think its nearly dinner time and movies will be beckoning. not to mention this is a freaking novella, so...im outski.

--if we took a holiday, just some time to celebrate...just one day out of life. it would be...it would be so nice--

so do you all know that chili joke by heart now? i guess i done left it up here long enough. but i didnt think blogging was appropriate...its very time consuming and i had me a house guest....mr alex. he stayed 6 full days, arriving late monday night (anything later would have technically qualified as tuesday morning) and left this morning at about 7:15, when i went to work.

it was a relaxing good time. we figured out that we spent more waking time at the olympic stadium with the expos than we did at my house. our record wasnt the best...we went 2 and 3. oh well. the first game and the last game were the victories, so there was a long ugly stretch of alex having to deal with sore-loser-steph...it aint pretty. they were pretty heart wrenching or aggravating...anyway the less said about that the better.

we also had a movie marathon. we saw:
on video:
-curse of the jade scorpion (dug it)
-mothman prophecies (dug it and bonus marks to mark pellington, the director, whose camera work is lovely, and who directed pearl jam's jeremy video...but thats not why i liked it, i swear....that movie is some creepy shit. creeeeeeeeeeeeepy.)
-gosford park (fell asleep)
-jay and silent bob strike back (fell asleep but will attempt second viewing tho it just seemed like an hour of milking the same old shtick to me)
in the theater:
-about a boy. i think its probably safe to say that of all five flicks this was both of our favorites. funny funny...hugh grant is just so perfect at playing aloof. see this movie, its got some great lines and its just the good stuff, brought to you by the same awesome mind that brought you high fidelity. whatcha doin sitting here reading still? i just said to go see it!

apart from that we basically just drove around, did some mild shopping, ate and slept. and made fun of each other. and had some good talking. and some bad talking. it was good to be with my friend. goodbyes are so crappy after hellos.

but my routine went on hiatus so i gotta work to get back to it. after not eating out since mexico thats all i been doing. after going to the gym five times a week since mexico ive now missed 8 days in a row....i was supposed to go to yoga today but work was so dead that i finished early and hanging around for 2 and a half hours wasnt in the cards. this entire past week has been insanely near unbearably hot...me and alex both with sheens of sweat all over us at all times...less than lovely. today its grey and breezy and its like stepping into any air conditioned turf..makes me want to go to sleep instantly. so i came home to 'clean up' (aka sit here and blog while listening to the ball game...4-0 expos going into the ninth, vladdy waiting for me and alex to NOT be at the game to smash a homer) and maybe do my yoga tape, but the new ikea catalogue was sitting in my mailbox so now all i wanna do is sit on the balcony and 'read' it.

the fact that i ate a disgusting combo of leftovers (general tao tofu with rice and two slices of veggie pizza...soon likely to be followed by those salty delicious michigan chips that i DEMANDED alex take out of my house that he deliberately and most evilly left behind) to stuff myself doesnt help move me toward exercise either. whats another day?

sooooo. ive been sitting here not writing for about 15 minutes straight.

i think im a little rusty at this blog thing, and am definitely distracted by the phenomenon of being alone here again. not that alex was in the way at all, he wasnt, couldnt be....but just that when you are used to having self time in the house and dont for a week, its cool to have it again. at least for the moment. i think that catalogue and i have a date on the balcony with a blanket on my lap. could be some expensive reading.

apparently, im done. might write more later, though. thats for mr alex.

oh, ps--i never need to hear that fucking in the middle jimmy eat world song again. ever.
pps- i REALLY want to go to laronde and play on the rides.

*aint got no song in my head at all...thats what the heat does to ya*