habit

i applied for a credit card, so where the fuck is it!??

i WANT these!!!!!!!!!

oops, i dont think the link brings you to the specific shoes. well, its in shoes, not sandals, and its the first pair, in black, the 'punctures'. wahhh, me want!

i know, i know. i need to update. but ive been busy, and tired. bad combo for writing.

its cold.

we had near record snowfall in november. the most snow for the month since 1983, and more than ten times what we had last year, which was virtually nothing. hooray 2002. evil mofo.

was supposed to sleep over at cari's sister's but didnt work out. grump grump. theyre picking me up in the AM instead. just as well, the baby would have been asleep already, and i feel guilty not spending any time with the cats.

those bald dave matthews shows are coming up, and its reality that i wont be at them. again, evil 2002 mofo. the satellite station i like to listen to at work, folk rock, played me grace is gone followed two songs later by crush. i was so happy, i was dancing around and didnt care. im in such dave-space. a customer was laughing at me and said he likes dmb too, but hasnt seen them live. imagine. ive seen them enough times for ten people.

my friend offered me bryan adams tickets for friday. he won them and cant go. so. do i want to hear cuts like a knife, i need somebody, and summer of 69 THAT badly? the answer is hell motherfucking no. hehehe, bryan adams. hahahahaha.

december 1st sucked royale. im not getting into it. the same friend suggested to me that i have rearviewmirror syndrome. and he didnt mean it in a pearl jam way. he meant my head is too much in yesterday and not enough on tomorrow. i told him i aim for the present tense, but he is right...im totally a past dweller and it does me ZERO good. friends are good. even if they cant name the lead singer of pearl jam.

speaking of whom, i dreamed the other night about being at a show, for the first time in ages. this time, chantal was sitting there waiting for us to get there, and she had a new boyfriend. you might have heard of him. his name was stone gossard. it made for a very happy dream. it was an outdoor show somewhere warm. cant wait.

ive been up since 450 this morning.

im fully into general hospital. to the point where im tempted to tape it if i think im gonna miss it. its all about brenda being back.

new eating trend: v8. i have a mini one every day. i realize that even tho im veg i barely eat any veg, and v8 is tasty and a good replacement. im gonna start buying soda can size instead of mini and actually get a good serving of veg in that way.

i fucking love my lush products. its gonna be expensive to, but i cant help it. the hair mask smells awesome, and makes my hair very soft and shiny. the body scrub...well they changed the scent of it to be more cinamonny than what im used to...but it still rules. and the tester face wash makes my face skin soft as a baby. its called angel something or other. i <3 you, lush. damn your high falutin prices.

had a fun night at anita's on saturday. played dirty scrabble with her and marni and allen. my contributions included: dildo. boner. glove. (as in no ____, no love). and my personal favorite: taco.

enjoyed friends and family weekend at the gap. bought much needed wardrobings, with emphasis on comfy clothes that are multi purpose: for the gym, for sleeping in, or for wearing out comfy style. sales are awesome. gap jeans fit me for shit though. so jeans are still needed. and boots.

i really would be pleased to find myself with a love interest.

monday mission!

1. Suppose God (or your deity of choice) grants you one miracle. Consider the world in which we live. Consider your life and family. What would you request for this miracle? Are you sure that is the best way to use it? You only get one.

only one. jesus lord. ummm. getting rid of the current distribution of money so that there are no insanely rich or insanely impoverished? curing disease? bringing back the dead of my choice? finding that love interest is starting to feel like its gonna take a miracle....

i have no idea how to answer this question. its way too heavy for a tired tired girl.

2. I believe that prayers do get answered, but I realize not everyone agrees. Have you ever had an experience where you truly believe your prayer was answered? If you don't believe in such things, how come? What is your philosophy on prayer?

when i was a kid in synagogue i used to think praying was asking god for things, mostly protecting the people and pets that i loved. but that was long long ago. when my dad was in hospital two years ago, having a heart attack in the icu on the other side of the wall from me, and the doctor told me and left me to sit there and wait, i remember focusing all my energy and just rocking back and forth thinking/saying 'come on daddy, come on daddy, come on daddy' over and over and over. if ever i would have thought i would have talked to god or whatever, it would have been then. but my concept of god is changed. its not a being you can request things of. its in all of us and all around and what i refer to as karma and energy and spirituality. praying is mostly just wishing out loud. if it comes from a place of love and innocence and hopefulness, it stands a chance.

3. Have you ever lost a pet? That is, have you ever had a pet get loose, run away or be stolen? Did you get it back? How did the loss impact your life?

my brother lost his boa constrictor in our house. it never turned up again. hehe, true story.

4. Getting together with family at the holidays is great, I just love it. Most of all I love the food. What is your favorite holiday food?

i make killer sweet potato latkes. tis the season, too. i should get on that. maybe my next day off, when im not shoppin with the girls. hehee, the girls. i sound 80.

5. One thing I've noticed about the holidays is that no one makes Pumpkin Pie like my Grandmother. She has totally spoiled me on her recipe, I just don't like the taste of anyone else's Pumpkin Pie. Are there are dishes or desserts that someone in your family fixes better than anyone else?

my bubby made the best oatmeal raisin cookies on earth. and even with the same recipe, my mom cant duplicate them. speaking of my mom, she makes the best cherry cheesecake on the planet too. i would pass up eating any other dessert for life for that. its the bestest. trust me.

6. Since I have no brothers or sisters, I am always wondering what it would have been like. Now that I am older, it kinda stinks that I will never be an Uncle. Do you have any siblings with children? How does it make you feel to be an Aunt or an Uncle? If not, would you like to be have nieces and nephews? Would you make a good relative to them?

i am DYING for my brother to have a kid. i dont care about being an aunt, honestly never thought about it for me, its that i want my parents to have grandchildren. i know they both want them pretty badly, and me and my brother are single losers. =( he's closer to it than me though. oh i hope i hope it happens.

7. I am putting together a CD of great holiday music. Do you have any suggestions of what songs (title/artist) I should include?

my favorite xmas song has always been the david bowie bing crosby ba rump a bum bum song. and feed the world. and let me sleep.

ok enough typey typey.

--heres to you
raise a glass for everyone
heres to them
underneath that burnin sun
do they know its christmas time at all?--