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By
AmasterMnd
It is very thrilling for your sub to know she is the subject of
your discipline. She wants rules and limits set for her and knows there
will be consequences for not obeying them. If there are no consequences
than she cannot feel the control that she longs for. Accepting a spanking
where the focus is on correcting her behavior rather than for her own
pleasure is proof of her submission to you. It makes your control of her
very real. There is a big distinction between a spanking given for the
pure enjoyment of it and one given as punishment. Through many pleasure
spankings are given under the guise of punishment for misbehaving, it's
clear that the focus is on its eroticism and the "punishment" aspect is
just a pretense. Some submissive women would never want a spanking they
thought was given as a punishment. For them, it is a completely
pleasurable experience and they don't want them to be associated with a
"punishment" in any form. However, there are some submissive women who
love to be spanked as a punishment and there are several reasons for this.
We all grew up knowing that spankings were given as a punishment and
though now as adults we find them pleasurable, the connection between
spankings and punishment still remains and can be a very hot erotic
trigger for the sub. If she started having spanking fantasies at a young
age, when having your bottom paddled and being punished are one in the
same, they will often revolve around the idea of being punished for some
reasons, whether real or imagined. Because society has a negative view of
D/s and SM, may women who crave a spanking or whipping often have great
conflicts about it, wondering how they could possibly be so "strange" or
"weird". It is often not an easy admission to make, so it's much easier to
rationalize the desire for a spanking by connecting it to a wrong doing in
order to "earn" a spanking rather than having the freedom to simply ask
their lover for one.
THE
DESIRE TO BE PERFECT
There is a tendency in some submissive women to be
"perfect." Though this can be an admirable goal, it can often be taken to
extremes and that's something to be aware of. I am now talking about the
desire to strive to improve, to make an effort to do the best job
possible, and as we know, that takes a great deal of energy. Here is a
quote that illustrates this point: "I started thinking about why
punishment appealed to me and I wasn't sure if it was just another way to
test limits or the thought of the luxury of having something "make" me do
the things I really want to do anyway…but, instead, I allow life (work,
fatigue) to get in the way. I have very high expectations for myself…I am
lucky in the fact that I am intelligent and beautiful…but I think given
these "gifts" that they should be utilized to the fullest
extent…"
A submissive woman like this wants to be "pushed" into
making a greater effort with herself. She knows what she is capable of
achieving and wants help in making it a reality. To me, this is one of the
most positive aspects of spankings treated as punishment. As her Master,
your responsibility is to take care of her and to see she does what is
best for her. You need to work with her to be sure her rules and limits
are for her own benefit and help her to meet her own personal goals. If
structured this way, the focus of the spanking is not because she was
"bad", but rather she is being spanked to help her improve herself. In
this way, your discipline of her is another way you can show her your love
and care. Here is a quote from a woman who loves the thought of being
punished for not meeting her own standards of behavior for herself. "One
of my fantasies is to have someone in my life just for the purpose of
correcting my faults. He would make me keep a list of all my misbehavior,
being late for work etc. Eating junk food, or nor going to the gym might
also be on the list. I would have to keep a list and once a week he would
come and read the list. He would make me describe each incident, he would
lecture me about it, and he would establish a separate punishment for each
incident on the list. And I would be told over and over what I am being
punished for, or would be required to recite it to him. Twelve swats of
the paddle for this, six strokes for that, etc. He would read them off the
list in random order, call me out of the corner at any moment too take my
next licking and send me back to the corner afterward." This is one of my
favorite quotes because it so clearly illustrates the connection between
behavior and its punishment. There is no doubt in her mind on why she is
being punished and she accepts her punishment knowing how much it will
help her to improve her behavior in the future.
For a sub, it is quite a luxury to have a
disciplinarian in their life and to not have to rely solely on their own
will-power. We all have chores to do that are not particularly enjoyable
and if left undone it weighs on our minds and becomes a burden. As her
Master, you can provide the "incentive" she needs to get what needs to be
done finished and out of the way so it does not hang over her and drain
her energy.
The thought and anticipation of being punished for not
doing something is often extremely exciting and this enables the sub to
tap into her sexual energy to complete her cores. For example, scrubbing
the kitchen floor is not much fun but the knowledge that she's in for a
good spanking if it's not completed can add tremendous sexual energy to
her task. You can also assist her in this by telling her that her work
will be "inspected" and if not found adequate she will be disciplined. By
the way, the work "inspection" is a very "hot" trigger for most subs.
Knowing her work will be reviewed helps her to focus on the task at hand
to do the kind of quality work she really wants to do but has to struggle
with finding sufficient energy.
Although this type of thing does not appeal to me, I have
spoken to submissives who truly enjoy this type of thing. The only other
thing I would caution on would be that it does not become a "game for the
sub" so that the meaning of the discipline and submission is
lost.
PUNISHMENT AS A WAY OF ABSOLUTION AND
FORGIVENESS
Another aspect of being "punished" is that it allows
her to let go of any self-imposed "guilt" over her behavior. This is
especially important for those women who strive to be perfect and have the
tendency to be self-critical. This can be compounded ig she was raised in
an environment where past mistakes were never forgotten but were
continually brought to her attention. When she is punished, she can face
her mistake, accept her punishment as a motivation to improve (not for
being "bad"), be completely forgiven and then to happily move
on.
SOME
CAUTIONS OVER PUNISHMENT SPANKINGS
Since a punishment spanking is going to be harder for
her to endure than one given for pleasure, you want to be sure she is in
the right mental head space for taking one. In other words, she must feel
the spanking is deserved, so my advice here is never punish her for
something left unclear. Make your rules very clear and specific so she
knows exactly when she is breaking them. If it helps, set time deadlines
so she can't claim she was just going to do it.
Another caution here about being consistent. If you
punish her one week for breaking a rule and let the same infraction go the
next, you are giving her very mixed and confusing signals which will make
it difficult for her to take your control seriously, and this will have
very negative consequences to both your roles. She will need to test you
until she feels secure you are going to follow through. So, please be
consistent.
PREPARING HER FOR PUNISHMENT
A punishment spanking is often more filled with ritual
than most any other scene and draws very much on her anticipation of an
event that she knows will be a test and challenge to her. Sending her to
her room to await you should excite her greatly even though she knows the
spanking may not be enjoyable. Making her fetch the implement used in her
correction is an added erotic embarrassment. You may want to have her
strip in advance and go to the corner to reflect upon her infraction and
what steps she is going to take in the future to avoid a similar lapse.
Or, you may want to have her place herself face down on the bed with a
pillow under her hips and paddle beside her. If you want to see just how
exciting the anticipation of a punishment can be, have her wait at least
10 minutes before you come into the room and then check her wetness. You
may want to lecture her on her behavior, emphasizing exactly what she did
to earn this correction, and during the spanking itself, pause several
times and give her the chance to promise better behavior in the future.
This is important as it keeps the emphasis on the punishment as motivation
to improve her behavior and not because she was "bad" or displeased you
for not getting it done. The focus of the punishment is less on her
pleasure (even though it will at least initially be very exciting) so you
may want to give her less of a warm up than usual before increasing the
intensity of the spanking. If you tell her in advance how many strokes she
is to be given it may help her to endure the spanking, knowing when the
end will come. If this is the second spanking for same offense, be sure to
increase the number of spankings so she gets the idea that a future lapse
will be met with more severity.
As further confirmation of your roles, after the
spanking she should thank you for taking the time and effort to discipline
her, and then it's up to you if you want to ravish her or send her to the
corner! The point I am making here is that even though this is
"punishment" there's no reason it cannot end in pleasure for her. After
all, she has been "punished" and all is forgiven.

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